CAP Euro London: Tales from the Dark Side

Hello dearest friends, colleagues, former colleagues, partners, affiliates and competitors...greetings from THE DARK SIDE! I have just completed my first online gaming conference as an operator and it was not that bad...in fact, I think I might like it even more. It's all about entertaining baby! After three years of dinner invitations, presents, endless booze, exclusive VIP party invites and much more, it is time for me to return the favor to the online gaming world, and of course, to the Everest VIP Partners. Also, it certainly helps that Everest's Director of Affiliate Marketing, Bob Land, is one of the most pleasurable people to be around (and work for) in the industry. How's that for some motivation to join our program? All plugs aside, I'm here to do the same thing as always...provide you with several highlights from our crazy online gaming shows so you can laugh, probably at my expense. Welcome to my experiences at CAP Euro London. Enjoy!

If it's in your budget, for the love of god, pay someone to set up your booth.
Everest Affiliates has a huge booth. A HUGE one. Very complex, lots of small parts, unbelievably confusing instructions and an extremely jet lagged team to set it up. We all know I'm experienced with setting up booths (and hand carrying them on airplanes) after my time with Casino City, but honestly, setting up a booth with 2,000 parts is just not OK. I guess it's cool when Alex Pratt stops by periodically throughout the afternoon to comment on our progress, and I guess it's even cooler when the actual booth set up people clap for us when the process is completed, but not cool enough. Skyline Whitespace, here we come.

Marcus Tandler can rock an SEO panel...and the dance floor.
Former go-go dancer Marcus Tandler (aka "Mediadonis") might be my favorite new person. Tell me, how many speakers have made you laugh during an SEO panel? If you have yet to meet Marcus Tandler, the answer is NONE! Hilarious! I learned more and laughed harder in that 1.5 hour SEO panel session than the entire conference combined. Not to mention this crazy German SEO master can tear up the dance floor, he owns a "Dyson Root 6 Badass handheld vacuum-cleaner" (whatever the hell that is), he recently purchased a Porsche with a big "69" painted on the hood, he is a damn good poker player, and he has a skull and crossbones ring and necklace. What a perfect man. I love this guy!

Pimpin' hot pink party buses are never a guarantee, so keep your mouth shut.
Who remembers the infamous "Alex VK" from Playshare who owns a party bus company? You know, the one wearing the sexy cowboy hat on his bus company website? Anyway, he hooked me up with a booking for his "pimpin' hot pink party bus" to whisk our VIP partners from the conference hotel to our VIP Partner dinner at Volt Lounge. So what do I do? Open my big mouth and tell everyone. So what happens? The bus gets in an accident the day before the booking...great...now everyone thinks I'm completely full of it. All embarrassment and tragedy aside, Alex's company did send along a double-decker commercial bus as a replacement, but I still looked like a jerk. Oh well. At least our dinner was pimpin'.

God Bless the Golden Girls.
No, I don't mean Dorothy, Rose, Blanche and Sophia. Trust me. Out of all the events I have attended throughout my online gaming career, the CAP Awards were absolutely one of the most entertaining. Hats off to the organizers of this one, you guys are truly brilliant. Shock factor is always a plus, especially when hosting an event for the very special, and very male, online gaming crowd. Surprise! The CAP Awards featured a group of topless ladies painted in gold who entertained the crowd by serving drinks and taking pictures with the all the online gaming men...and me. Ha. In addition to the Golden Girls, Shirley Bassey entertained the crowd by singing a few numbers, we enjoyed a stand up comedian's performance, and Michael Caselli forgot to announce Dominique's award. It's ok Mikey, we still love you.

If you want late night, plan it with Warren.
Saturday night. 2am. Private club in London. One girl trying to get herself, six German guys and a Swede in the door. Riiiiight. We arrived at Dolce and were promptly turned away at the door by a big scary bouncer who claimed there was no such table under Warren's name. What a liar. Just as we decided to move on, low and behold, the mighty Warren came outside to fetch us, and what a late night he hosted. Warren and his Casino Affiliate Programs, Poker Affiliate Programs and Affiliate Speedpay crews had reserved a huge table full of booze right in the center of the dance floor. It was the light at the end of the tunnel, it was the oasis in a dry, dry, desolate desert. Thank you for one of the best nights ever and thank you for making me look pretty damn good in front of Everest's finest partners. Big W, I owe you one.

Hot tubs in living rooms are cool.
My Saturday night did not end at the private club. Neither did Tomas's, Samantha's, Richard's, Christoph's or Ryan's- this DIE HARD gaming crowd decided that 4am on Saturday was far too early to call it quits. What did we decide to do? The answer is obvious. We headed back to an alcohol filled apartment fully equipped with a huge flat screen TV and music system, Michael Jackson music videos, and a hot tub in the living room. What else would you expect? A hot tub in the living room is totally normal, and so are dance lessons to Michael Jackson music at 6am. I am pretty sure my appearance horrified the Everest team in the hotel lobby several hours later before heading to Heathrow, but you know what? It was totally worth it. I can dance now.